Dagger and Eiko

An observation I wanted to make.  Spoilers for FFIX below this point.

In Final Fantasy IX, you have two surviving summoners, Dagger and Eiko.  Eiko is six-years-old and was raised by summoners.  Dagger is sixteen, and had completely forgotten her summoner heritage, since she was raised elsewhere.

They learn broadly similar skills; white magic and summons.  The difference is, Dagger learns twice as many summons, and Eiko learns twice as much white magic.  This discrepancy is reflected in their Trance states, too; Dagger's is focused around making her summons stronger, while Eiko's gives her double white magic.

In short;  Dagger is a much better, stronger summoner, while Eiko is a better white mage, and that's overcoming how they were raised.

Just seemed worth pointing out.

Maybe I'll replay FFIX next.

Breath of Fire IV - Killing Treans

I finally killed a Trean!

I'm using a line-up of Cray, Ursula, and Scias.

Turn 1: Cray casts Charm, Scias uses Megaphone, Ursula uses War Shout.  Scias' HP was at 1, so he also used Rakhasa in this turn.

Turn 2: Cray uses Last Resort, Scias uses Megaphone, Ursula uses War Shout.

Turn 3:  FUCKING NINA'S WILL RUINS SCIAS' 1HP.  Cray uses Backhand on Scias, Scias uses Focus, Ursula guards.

Turn 4: Cray uses Tiger Fist, Ursula uses Triple Blow, Scias uses Reversal.  Fucking Trean dies!

Turn 5: Treans escape.

Alternatively;

Turn 1:  We brutally murder Nina.  Her hp was already at one, so it only took one blow.

Turn 2: Cray casts Charm, Scias uses Megaphone, Ursula uses War Shout.  Scias' HP was at 1, so he also used Rakhasa in this turn.  He'll probably use it at some point, as long as his HP is at 1.  Rakhasa gives you an automatic Last Resort effect, and 1HP means Reversal becomes a lot more powerful.

Turn 3: Cray uses Last Resort, Scias uses Megaphone, Ursula uses War Shout.

Turn 4:  Scias uses Focus, Cray uses Tiger Fist, Ursula uses Reversal.

Turn 5:  Cray uses Tiger Fist, Scias uses Shadowwalk, Ursula uses Reversal.  Repeat for two turns.  My party are far too weak to pull this off, though, luckily, Scias is apprenticed to Kyrik, and finishes one off for me after I've hacked away at it for long enough.

The Treans will run away either on the ninth turn, or on the turn after you kill one of them.  

This second scenario might be worth attempting again later; with Ursula, Reversal hits all of them, for 10-15,000 damage each.  Tiger Fist also hits all, but misses a lot.  I finally got a Nunchaku in this battle (this was the 3rd or 4th Treant I killed, so it doesn't take too long), which raised Cray's power to 474.

Breath of Fire IV - Update

I was in my early teens when I bought Breath of Fire IV.  Maybe as young as eleven, which would make it thirteen years ago.  It was the first Breath of Fire game I ever owned, so it may be surprising that it's the one Breath of Fire game I've never completed.  I don't know why.  I've gotten as far as the end of Chapter III before, but no further.

There comes a point, in a lot of RPGs, where you need to run around and take of a lot of subquests and minigames before you get to the final boss.  That's always the point at which my attention begins to wane.  I think there's a part of me that doesn't actually want to finish games, because that happens quite a lot.  That's the whole reason behind my Completion Project - to challenge me not to give up at that point. Like I'm not going to this time.  I'm going to sit here all weekend and finish this damn game if it's the last thing I do.

I have very little left to complete.  I've completed every master and learned every skill.  I've caught every fish, though I've not crowned all of them yet.  I just need to get all the best weapons for my characters - which will involve more fishing, since I only have 51 stamp cards - defeat Treans and Riders - partly for pride, partly to get another weapon - and get through the final dungeon.

These are the items I've yet to get;

• Mass Driver - For Ershin.  104 attack.  Steal from Chopam in Fou-Lu's tomb.

• Nunchaku - For Cray.  145 Attack.  Dropped by Trean in Abandoned Village.

• Linked Pole - For Cray.  133 power.  Manillo Store.  Trade 75 stamp cards for it.
• Render - For Scias.  2 hits, attack varies with number of battles fought.  Trade 99 stamp cards to any Manillo.

• GooKing Sword - For Ryu.  152 power.  You have a 1/256 chance of winning this sword by defeating a Goo King in the Imperial Castle.
• Ouroboros - For Nina.  96 attack.  Casts Raise Dead if used as an item.  Steal from Beihl in the basement of the Imperial Castle. 
• Slicer - For Scias.  78 attack, 2 hits.  Dropped by Kolpum in Imperial Castle.
• Angel's Vest - For Nina and Ursula.  94 defence.  Dropped by a Warder in the Imperial Castle, or steal from Star Gazer in Imperial Castle.

• Dragon Blade - For Ryu.  128 power.  On B1 of the Imperial Castle.
• Dragon Armour - For Ryu.  96 defence.  1F of the Imperial Castle.

• Royal Sword - For Ryu.  96 power, two hits.  Steal from Astral dragon, a boss near the end of the game.
• Royal Armour - For Ryu.  102 defence.  Steal from Tyrant, a boss near the end of the game.

I've categorised them loosely according to where they are, and/or how you get them.  I think my information on the Angel's Vest is wrong, since the game reckons I've received all the items from the Stargazer and the Angel's Vest isn't on the list.  We'll see.

I'm just doing a bit more levelling, to boost my stats to have another go at Treans.  I want to complete my Manillo shops list with points, so I'll do a bit more fishing for that, then try to figure out the most efficient way to get enough points for 149 stamp cards.  Luckily, levelling and fishing I can do while watching TV, so I'll be catching up on Elementary as well, or reading Carrie.  Wish me luck!

Breath of Fire IV - Manillo Stores

In Breath of Fire IV you can trade your caught fish for items at various Manillo stores, much like in Breath of Fire III.  However, in IV the Manillo are wandering around town rather than swimming with the fishes (not a euphemism).  You get stamps when you purchase items; twenty stamps will fill a stamp card.  You can trade stamp cards as follows;

Cards	Item	Description
3	Magic Shard	+1 to max AP.
3	Power Food	+1 to Attack.
3	Swallow Eye	+1 to Agility.
3	Fish Head	+1 to Wisdom.
25	Coupons	Accessory.  User receives a discount on all purchases.
50	Dragon Tear	Accessory.  Protects wearer from all status changes.
75	Linked Pole.	Weapon for Cray, with 133 attack.  Damage changes with enemy's power.  One of Cray's best weapons.
99	Render	Weapon for Scias.  Attack 50, but changes based on number of battles fought.  2 hits.  If used as an item, casts Frost.  One of Scias' best weapons.

Manillo Stores

Shyde

I came here immediately from Ludia, before going to Worent.  I was able to buy Earth Claws, a Ruby Scepter and a Broad Sword; I knew spending an episode of Charmed in each fishing spot was a good idea.

Items	Fish	Stamps
Earth Claws	5 x Sweetfish	7.50
Ruby Scepter	5 x Trout	10.00
Broad Sword	2 x RainbowTrout 2 x Trout 2 x Sweetfish	14.00
Flail	3 x Black Bass 3 x Blue Gill 6 x Piranha	--
Firangi	3 x Black Bass 3 x MartianSquid 6 x Bass	--
Holy Mantle	3 x RainbowTrout 6 x Browntail	25.50
Bell Collar	3 x RainbowTrout 6 x Browntail	25.50
Aurum	5 x Jellyfish	4.00

Wyndia

Lots of new bait here!

Items	Fish	Stamps
Gold Top	1 x Blowfish 2 x Flying Fish	5.00
Warbler	1 x Blowfish 2 x Flying Fish	5.00
Flattop	2 x Blowfish	4.00
Hanger	2 x Blowfish	4.00
Toad	3 x Flying Fish	4.50
Tail	3 x Flying Fish	4.50
Bamboo Rod	2 x Sea Bream	6.00
Aurum	5 x Man-o'-War	4.00

Sarai

Return here after getting the shift spell, and the Manillo store will be open for business.

Items	Fish	Stamps
Icicle	3 x Flatfish	8.40
Napalm	3 x Sea Bream	9.00
Taser	3 x Octopus	10.50
Ginseng	1 x Bonito 1 x Octopus 1 x Sea Bream	10.10
Dragon Scale	1 x Bonito 1 x Octopus 1 x Flatfish	9.90
Headband	1 x Bonito 1 x Sea Bream 1 x Flatfish	9.40
Moon Tears	1 x Spearfish 1 x Angler 1 x Bonito	12.65
Aurum	3 x Sea Bass	8.40

Checkpoint

Items	Fish	Stamps
Barrier Ring	1 x Salmon 2 x Rainbow Trout 4 x Browntail	21.00
Light Ring	2 x MartianSquid 2 x Blue Gill 4 x Piranha	17.40
Diamond Ring	1 x Salmon 2 x Rainbow Trout 4 x Browntail	21.00
Astral Ward	1 x Dorado 4 x Black Bass 6 x Bass	28.00
Body Ward	1 x Dorado 4 x Black Bass 6 x Bass	28.00
Soul Ring	1 x Sturgeon 2 x Salmon 2 x Bullcat	21.90
Topaz Tear	1 x Barandy 2 x Dorado 2 x MartianSquid	22.00
Aurum	3 x Bass	6.00

Lyp

Items	Fish	Stamps
Platinum Top	1 x Browntail 1 x Trout 1 x Sweetfish	6.00
Dancer	1 x Black Bass 1 x Blue Gill 1 x Piranha	6.85
Swisher	1 x Browntail 1 x Trout 1 x Sweetfish	6.00
Deep Diver	1 x Black Bass 1 x Blue Gill 1 x Piranha	6.85
Fat Frog	1 x Browntail 1 x Trout 1 x Sweetfish	6.00
Crab	1 x Black Bass 1 x Blue Gill 1 x Piranha	6.85
Angling Rod	2 x Salmon 2 x Dorado 2 x MartianSquid	20.70
Aurum	3 x Bass	5.00

Chiqua

Items	Fish	Stamps
Skull Staff	10 x Jellyfish 10 x Man-o'-War	16.00
Chopsticks	2 x MartianSquid 2 x Octopus	14.00
Repeater	1 x Spearfish 3 x Bonito	15.80
Giant Club	2 x Black Porgy 6 x Sea Bream	--
Power Glove	2 x Black Porgy 6 x Sea Bream	--
Force Armour	1 x Spearfish 1 x Angler 5 x Flatfish	--
Holy Robe	1 x Spearfish 1 x Angler 5 x Octopus	--
Aurum	3 x Sea Bass	8.40

Astana

Items	Fish	Stamps
Ivory Dice	5 x Angelfish 5 x Moorfish	21.50
Earthbreaker	1 x Whale 1 x Barandy 3 x Dorado	28.99
Culverin	1 x Whale 2 x Sturgeon 2 x Barandy	35.59
Life Armor	1 x Whale 1 x Sturgeon 3 x Bullcat	26.69
Star Dress	3 x Whale 8 x Acheron	51.57
Healing Ring	1 x Spearfish 1 x Angler 2 x Black Porgy	14.65
Cupid's Lyre	1 x Spearfish 1 x Angler 2 x Black Porgy	14.65
Aurum	1 x Angelfish 1 x Moorfish	4.30

Breath of Fire IV - Ultimate Equipment List

Individual Character Lists

• Ryu
• Nina
• Ershin
• Cray
• Scias
• Ursula

Weapons

• GooKing Sword - For Ryu.  152 power.  You have a 1/256 chance of winning this sword by defeating a Goo King in the Imperial Castle.
• Dragon Blade - For Ryu.  128 power.  On B1 of the Imperial Castle.
• Royal Sword - For Ryu.  96 power, two hits.  Steal from Astral dragon, a boss near the end of the game. 
• Ouroboros - For Nina.  96 attack.  Casts Raise Dead if used as an item.  Steal from Beihl in the basement of the Imperial Castle.  
• Electrifier - For Ursula.  110 attack, hits one, low hit rate.  Found in Fou-Lu's tomb.
• Culverin - For Ursula.  108 attack, hits all.  Manillo Store in Astana.  1 x Whale, 2 x Sturgeon, 2 x Barandy.
• Nunchaku - For Cray.  145 Attack.  Dropped by Trean in Abandoned Village.
• Linked Pole - For Cray.  133 power.  Manillo Store.  Trade 75 stamp cards for it.
• Cleaver - For Scias.  119 attack.  Steal from Horseman in Imperial Castle.
• Slicer - For Scias.  78 attack, 2 hits.  Dropped by Kolpum in Imperial Castle.
• Render - For Scias.  2 hits, attack varies with number of battles fought.  Trade 99 stamp cards to any Manillo.
• Mass Driver - For Ershin.  104 attack.  Steal from Chopam in Fou-Lu's tomb.

Armour

• Royal Armour - For Ryu.  102 defence.  Steal from Tyrant, a boss near the end of the game.
• Dragon Armour - For Ryu.  96 defence.  1F of the Imperial Castle.
• Life Armour - For Ryu, Cray, and Scias.  90 defence.  Heals 100hp per turn.  Buy from Manilla in Astana; 1 Whale, 1 Sturgeon, 3 Bullcat.
• Angel's Vest - For Nina and Ursula.  94 defence.  Dropped by a Warder in the Imperial Castle, or steal from Star Gazer in Imperial Castle.
• Star Dress - For Nina.  92 defence.  Manilla Store in Astana near the end of the game.  Whale x 3, Acheron x 8.
• Gideon's Garb - For Cray.  93 defence, +10 to attack.  Dropped by Battle Suit in Astana (Imperial HQ), after it has been infested with the Hex.  It's a rare drop, so it might take a while.
• King's Armour - For Scias.  100 Defence.  Stolen from Rider in Mukto Ruins.
• Chopam Plate - For Ershin.  50 defence.  Dropped by Chopam in Fou-Lu's tomb.
• Mithril Rig - for Ershin.  50 defence, but heavier than Chopam plate.  Forged at the Smithy by  mixing 3 x Iron Scraps.

Breath of Fire IV - Kali's Fishing Record

This one's just for me.  The names of all the fish in Breath of Fire IV, the largest I've caught, and whether or not that was large enough for a crown.  Plus the points!

Fish	Largest	Crown	Points
Jellyfish	31cm	✓	80
Piranha	38cm	--	135
Bass	64cm	✓	200
Blue Gill	54cm	✓	250
Sweetfish	25cm	✓	150
Browntail	70cm	✓	250
Black Bass	70cm	✓	300
Angelfish	31cm	✓	250
Trout	42cm	✓	200
Rainbow Trout	70cm	✓	350
Bullcat	84cm	✓	380
Martian Squid	73cm	✓	350
Dorado	97cm	✓	400
Salmon	145cm	✓	400
Barandy	209cm	✓	700
Sturgeon	216cm	--	630
Man-o'-War	31cm	✓	80
Flying Fish	35cm	✓	150
Blowfish	51cm	✓	200
Moorfish	29cm	--	180
Sea Bass	75cm	✓	280
Flatfish	52cm	✓	280
Sea Bream	71cm	✓	300
Octopus	82cm	✓	350
Bonito	118cm	--	360
Black Porgy	51cm	--	280
Angler	132cm	--	405
Spearfish	191cm	✓	500
Whale	259cm	✓	999
Acheron	41cm	--	240

Breath of Fire IV - Ershin's Best Equipment

Mass Driver - 104 attack.  Steal from Chopam in Fou-Lu's tomb.

Chopam Plate - 50 defence and "resists both physical and magical attacks".  Dropped by Chopam in Fou-Lu's tomb.

OR

Mithril Rig - 50 defence (but is heavier than Chopam Plate).  Forge at the Smithy from Iron Scraps x 3.

As you can see, there is only one enemy with whom you need to be concerned here.

To find Chopam;  he's in Fou-Lu's tomb.  You remember the block which took you down into the depths of the tomb, and then, eventually out in Mukto?  Ride that back all the way up, and Chopam will most commonly appear on the steps right in front of them.  Yes those little 2 x 1 steps.  Stay on them.

Getting the Chopam Plate from the Chopam is relatively easy - as long as you can kill him, you've got a very fair chance of getting it.  I've done a bit of levelling with the Bots, which helped.  Getting the Mass Driver is quite a bit harder.


To defeat Chopam; he will be invulnerable for two turns, so just try to steal or guard.  Maybe cast Charm, though you probably don't need to.  On the third turn, I found that a combo of Nina using Oracle, Ershin using Spray and Cray using Triple Blow worked very well, and did over 10,000 damage.

To steal from Chopam: use characters who are faster than he is - that is, with an agility of 140 or more - in order to steal from him twice on the fourth turn, before he is able to run away.  I used Nina and Ursula, one with Pilfer, one with Steal.  That gives you eight chances per battle, rather than six. 

Staying on the stairs heavily increases your chances of running into him, to the point of roughly every other battle. This makes a huge difference to how much this takes.  Even though you do have to look at the screen more and can't watch TV or read quite as much (trust me, you will want to be doing something else at the time).

I finally managed to steal one off, roughly, the tenth Chopam I faced.  Finally!

Breath of Fire IV - Scias' Best Equipment

Cleaver - 119 attack.  Steal from Horseman in Imperial Castle.

OR

Slicer - 78 attack, 2 hits.  Dropped by Kolpum in Imperial Castle.

OR

Render - 2 hits, attack varies with number of battles fought.  Trade 99 stamp cards to any Manillo.

King's Armour - 100 Defence.  Stolen from Rider in Mukto Ruins.



The King's Armour was surprisingly easy to get.  To find Rider, head to the Mukto Ruins.  See the jump spot behind the block?  Jump onto the path and run round to the left (North).  In the tunnel, look for the weakened wall, and use Ershin to break through it.  Head through the (very short) tunnels.  In the final room, you'll find an obelisk, marking where Fou-Lu was summoned, and a Dragon Tear (excellent accessory; protects from all status effects).  In here, you can run into Rider.

I had Ursula and Nina with Steal and Pilfer, and Scias healing in the third position.  I ran away once I had it.  I'll go back and kill him later.

Breath of Fire IV - Cray's Best Equipment

Nunchaku - 145 Attack.  Dropped by Trean in Abandoned Village.

OR

Linked Pole - 133 power.  Manillo Store.  Trade 75 stamp cards for it.

Gideon's Garb - 93 defence, +10 to attack.  Dropped by Battle Suit in Astana, near the end of the game.

OR

Life Armour - Defence 90.  Heals 100hp each turn.  buy from Manillo Store in Astana.  Costs one Whale, one Sturgeon, and three Bullcats.

It took me about half an hour of fighting to get the Gideon's Garb.  I bought one set of Life Armour when I first caught whales and sturgeons; Scias had it first, until I got his King Armour, then Cray, and now Ryu will wear it until I find him something better.

The Mist Armour you can buy in Chedo also has 93 defence, and is slightly lighter than the Gideon's Garb.  The main difference is that the Gideon's Garb also raises your attack, while the Life Armour constantly heals you, making them bother slightly better options.

Treans have a pretty high chance of dropping Nunchakus.  I got one off the third one that I managed to kill; not that it's much easier to kill one out of a group than the whole group.

You can see more information on the Manillo Stores here.

Breath of Fire IV - Ursula's Best Equipment

Electrifier - 110 attack, hits one, low hit rate.  Found in Fou-Lu's tomb.

OR

Culverin - 108 attack.  Manillo Store in Astana.  1 x Whale, 2 x Sturgeon, 2 x Barandy.

Angel's Vest -Steal from Star Gazer in Imperial Castle.

Breath of Fire IV - Nina's Best Equipment

 Ouroboros - 96 attack.  Casts Raise Dead if used as an item.  Steal from Beihl in the basement of the Imperial Castle.
 
Angel's Vest - 94 defence.  Steal from a Warder in the Imperial Castle.

OR

Star Dress - 92 defence.  Manillo Store in Astana near the end of the game.  Whale x 3, Acheron x 8.

You'll find both Warder and Beihl in the basement of the Imperial Castle.  It shouldn't take more than 20 or so steals to get the desired items.  Star Dress isn't really worth it, since Angel's Vest is so easy to get.  Unless you want to get eight Acherons, in which case, what else are you going to spend them on?

I found Warders appeared most often on B1.

Breath of Fire IV - Ryu's Best Equipment

GooKing Sword - 152 power.  You have a 1/256 chance of winning this sword by defeating a Goo King in the Imperial Castle.

OR

Dragon Blade - 128 power.  On B1 of the Imperial Castle.

OR

Royal Sword - 96 power, two hits.  Steal from Astral dragon, a boss near the end of the game.

Royal Armour - 102 defence.  Steal from Tyrant, a boss near the end of the game.

OR

Dragon Armour - 96 defence.  1F of the Imperial Castle.

OR

Life Armour - 90 defence.  Heals 100hp per turn.  Buy from Manilla in Astana; 1 Whale, 1 Sturgeon, 3 Bullcat.

Breath of Fire IV - Levelling with Bots for Fun and Profit

Full credit for this trick goes to the maker of this video; I'd never heard of it before.

In short, what you need to do is go to Sinchon and find some Bots. You can do this at any point after reaching Sinchon; I waited until I was able to apprentice all my characters to Bunyan. He increases all stats while decreasing the amount that HP and AP rises by each level.  After a couple of levels with him, I'll switch to Marlok to bring the HP and AP back up.  Remember that Masters don't decrease your stats; they just decrease or increase the amount that they rise by upon levelling. 

Anyway, you've found some bots.  Great!  Ideally, you want to be attacked by at least two or three, rather than one.

1. Hit them with a weak wind + water combo.  I gave Eddy to Ershin, and used that and Scias' Frost to create the combo.  Finish by having Nina heal whichever bot you focused the attacks on.
2. Use Nina and Scias to heal the other two Bots.  If you're facing two bots rather than three, just have Nina heal.  3rd character guards.
3. Everyone guards.
4. Rinse & repeat.  The bots will recover at the start of this turn, so your attacks will just break their bodies open again.

Every time you break the Bots open, their exp will double, to a maximum of 65535.  Have fun!

Breath of Fire Series

Another tiny piece of evidence for Breath of Fire VI being the prequel to Breath of Fire, if the games are connected; in IV, Deis says this is her first time on a ship.

Breath of Fire IV - Faerie Shops

The items and weapons that a faerie stocks depends on what type she is - ordinary, odd, lazy, or diligent.  You can have up to three faeries in a shop at a time, and each one will have her own inventory, so you should be able to work through these fairly quickly.  Each shop gains eight items.

Items

Ordinary
Healing Herb - 20z
Antidote - 12z
Panacea - 100z
Ammonia - 250z
Bamboo Rod - 250z
Vitamin - 100z
Wisdom Seed - 800z
Multivitamin - 500z


Odd
Molotov - 100z
Electrode - 100z
Void Sphere - 500z
Dynamite - 500z
Icicle - 600z
Napalm - 800z
Taser - 1200z
Belladonna - 200z

Diligent
Healing Herb - 20z
Antidote - 12z
Panacea - 100z
Ammonia - 250z
Vitamin - 100z
Wisdom Seed - 800z
Multivitamin - 1500z
Vitamins - 1000z

Lazy
Bird Drop - 2z
Rotten Meat - 2z
Scorched Rice - 4z
Knockout Gas - 100z
Flash Grenade - 100z
Poison Powder - 100z
Mouth Gag - 100z
Spoon - 120z

Weapons

Ordinary
Bamboo Stick - 130z
Glass Domino - 220z
Taegum - 3000z
Poison Ward - 2500z
Dream Ring - 3000z
UV Goggles - 3000z
Balance Ring - 3000z
Stunner - 7700z

Odd
Manly Clothes - 2000z
Talisman - 300z
Aura Ring - 500z
Life Sandals - 500z
Fire Ward - 2500z
Wind Ward - 2500z
Water Ward - 2500z
Earth Ward - 2500z

Diligent
Bamboo Stick - 300z
Glass Domino - 220z
Speed Boots - 4500z
Wisdom Ring - 5000z
Sage's Frock - 7000z
Winged Boots - 7000z
Titan's Boots - 6000z
Ice Blade - 4200z

Lazy
Pointed Stick - 10z
Short Skirt - 3200z
Hawk's Ring - 6000z
Artemis Cap - 6000z
Hidden Dagger - 4900z
Hunting Cap - 8000z
Harmonic Ring - 25000z
Shaman's Ring - 40000z

My Boyfriend's a Dick!

So I was idly minding my own business on facebook when someone posted this link.  That tumblr consists of screenshots from the iOS and Android app Boyfriend Maker.  It's a basic boyfriend sim, but what makes it so interesting is the chat feature.  If you've clicked on that link then you've probably guessed that the chat is a chatbot which is entirely user-taught.

A fake boyfriend taught how to interact by the internet?  How can that possibly go wrong?

Before we get into that, let's talk about the app itself.  It was removed when the controversy over the chat stirred up, but is now back in a new form, Boyfriend Plus.  I downloaded it immediately, just to see what would happen.  It's free, and theoretically, it's rated for ages 4 and up.  Like hell it's suitable for ages 4 and up.  I found it hilarious, but I knew what I was letting myself in for.  Do not, under any circumstances show this app to a child.  Do not show it to anyone without warning them.  The content can be quite threatening, and references rape and paedophilia, amongst other things, both subjects which can be incredibly triggering to people.

Okay, first thing.  You load up the app, and you're introduced to a new boy, who you can name.  Let's go with Vivienne (I know the image says Luke.  That was before I learned that Vivienne is more suitable).

The first thing the app encourages you to do?  'Flirt' with him.  By which it means kiss and stroke.  On the cheek and shoulder respectively, but still, that's pretty far for the first few minutes of meeting.

You're then encouraged to dress your boy up by buying him accessories (fake money, not real money).  You see why I said Vivienne was a good name for him?

Once you've dressed up your escort, you take him out to dinner.  The game rewards you for getting him to say certain words or phrases, in my case, 'hi', 'merry Christmas' and 'Happy New Year'.  I didn't bother with those.  Instead, when I asked my escort what he thought of those lovely gifts I just bought him (my man gots to look nice) he threw a racial slur at me.

....okaaaaay.  Moving on.  He brought up some random name, and told me she was the most beautiful girl in the world (what have people been teaching him?).  When I complained, he told me he loved me, then laughed in my face when I replied with an astonished "You love me?".  Then he demanded cookies.  So just like a real man then.  Also, dude, we're at a restaurant, I'm not going to just cook for you.  That's insulting to the staff.

So, I called him a creep.  He replied with "So are you.  You stalk your crush.  Don't lie".

...finally.  A man who understands me.

On our second date, I began by asking him why on earth he'd told a virtual stranger (well, I'm real; he's virtual) that he loved them.  He said he didn't know and apologised.  I told him I might forgive him.  Then I accused him of being an erotomaniac.  He seemed oddly pleased about that.

It was when I asked him to stop stalking me that things went a little weird. In short;  I appear to be tied up by a psychopath who is ranting on about tumblr.  And laughing at me.

Something to mention at this point;  talking on a date costs energy, which is refreshed by time.  It takes approximately four hours to refill your energy bar.  You can pay fake money to refill it, for $200 a pop (this will be relevant later).  You start with $1000, and are occasionally awarded more for things like getting your boyfriend to say those key words I mentioned earlier.  You also get $1 (or whatever currency they use) every time you talk to a random guy on the street.  Speaking of guys on the street, I think I'm the only woman on this bizarre world.  This probably explains why I'm tied up.

 I asked him to stop.  He said "no!".  I said "yes!".  Then he turned nice again, and asked me to be in a relationship.  When I refused he "grab[ed] an old scarf and shove[d] it in [my] mouth placing the tape over it again".

See the key word in that sentence?

Again.

Crazy fucking bastard had me gagged before!

I struggled.  He seemed to enjoy it.  Then I headbutted him, and....

Ran out of energy.

Will our intrepid heroine escape from the psycopathic, pretty, Phantom of Dudeworld?  Will Vivienne the Psycho ever stop staring?  What happened to the cookies?

Tune in next time to find out!

Breath of Fire IV - Master Notes

I'm having the same problem I had in Breath of Fire III, that of knowing who to apprentice to whom.  So I'm going with the same solution I used then - writing down which stats are most important for which characters.  So;

Nina

Essentially, a battle mage with healing magic.  So, intelligence and AP are paramount.

Ryu
Needs high AP for dragons, as well as high strength generally.

Cray
Strength and HP.  Maybe some magic and AP for spells, but I mostly use him for chaining combos.

Ershin
Strength and defence.  Again, I use her for linking combos, but the actual attack power isn't so important.


Scias
Attack, AP, and intelligence.  Essentially a red mage.

Ursula 
Can't recall her strengths at the moment.

Kobo Competitions

Kobo are currently running a competition in which you answer questions on books and win at least a 10% off code.  The codes can only be used on certain books, but I did find some interesting choices in that list.  The competition is open until the 28th of April 2013, and there will be a new question each day.  You can go back and answer the old ones at any time up till the 28th.  You can only use the codes until the 28th, so bear that in mind.

The codes go up to 75% off (though the most I've ever won is 30%) and if you answer all ten, you're in with a chance to win £950 (translated from $1500).

They ran a similar competition last month, so this is probably going to be a recurring thing.  Last time, I spent my codes on Dare Me, which was awesome.  Very dark and disquieting.

How to Handsew a Sleep Mask

I know this isn't a gaming post, but this is the best format I can think of to write it in.  And I'll give it a special tag and everything.

Sleep masks are a nice little project.  They can be handsewn in an hour or two, or machine stitched even quicker.  They're easy for beginners, and, best of all, they're functional.  I didn't realise how much light pollution was affecting my sleep until it was gone.  It makes such a huge difference to have something over your eyes.  Plus, if you need to sleep with a light on (if there's someone else in the room for instance) or during daytime, they're fantastic.  When I stayed at a youth hostel over Christmas (I was working in a homeless shelter) having my eyemask made such a huge difference to how well I slept.

My First Eyemask

The first thing you need to do is choose your fabric.  I made my first eyemask from scraps off an old jumper I had, and some other bits of spare fabric.  The one I made yesterday is made up off little bits of fabric that I bought for bandanas.  If you buy half a metre you can cut two square bandanas out of it and have a little rectangle leftover that's perfect for this.  The one I'm making now is made out of an old top which was very soft while being thick enough to effectively block light.

Next, make a template.  Scrunch up a sheet of paper (A5 is big enough) until it's soft, then lay it over your face and use a felt tip to draw around your brow- and cheekbones.

Once you've done that, trace whichever half is neatest onto a folded sheet of paper, neatening it up as you go. Unfold the paper, and voila...you have a symmetrical mask template.  Use it to cut a mask shape out of your fabric; I recommend at least four layers, depending on thickness.  Remember to leave margins for sewing.  At this stage, hold all of your layers over your eyes to judge how well they block the light.  If it's not dark, add a few more.

 Carefully pin your layers together.  You want them in this order;  the two outsides, facing towards each other, then the inner layers on top.  Carefully pin this shape together along the outsides.

This bit is optional, but useful; fold your mask in half, and pin a small section, running halfway down the mask, as shown below.  Pin through one of the top layers and all of the inner layers; do not pin through both top layers.  Sewing this, as shown below, shapes the mask for your nose.  If you want a more personal fit, hold the mask over your face and pinch.  This will reduce light seeping in from around the base of your nose.  If you pin through both top layers, you won't be able to turn the mask rightside out later.

Once you've done that, proceed to sew most of the way around the outsides of the mask, through all the layers this time.  Leave a small gap, and turn the mask rightside out.  Finish sewing it up carefully from the outside.  I used ladder stitch, and you can find a tutorial on that here.

Sew some ribbons to the side to close it up, and you're done.  To get the right length of ribbon, wrap it around your head one and a half times, cut it in half and sew each half to one side of the mask.  You could use elastic, or do something creepy and sew buttons over the eyes of the mask and fasten the ribbon to that so you don't have knots on your head while you're sleeping, but then you'll look like something out of Coraline.  Which could be awesome.  Try it.

Et voila, reversible sleep mask!

Kobo Achievements

The Kobo is an ereader, created by a Canadian company and affiliated with WHSmith (yes, I am aware that eReaders are not games.  I don't care).  I have a Kobo Mini which is adorably tiny and fits in my jeans pocket.  I bought my Kobo just before Christmas, since I was going to stay in London in order to work in a homeless shelter.  In 2011 I took a pile of books which were heavy, awkward, and finished before I came home.  The Kobo was a LOT easier.  I wasn't sure about eReaders before I got one, but I love it.  I'll write a full review at some point, but, for now, I just want to talk about the achievements.  I'm planning on getting a Kindle as well, so maybe I'll just write a comparison.  If you're thinking of getting an eReader, and you have a smartphone, I highly recommend starting with the various free apps.  They work in much the same way as the eReaders do, and should give you an idea.  I wish I'd done that.

Anyway.  Kobo has a 'reading life' section which lists various statistics, like how much of your library you've read, and how long it's taken you.  It also has various awards or achievements that you can earn for completing various tasks (like X-Box achievements).  As well as the eReader, I have the Kobo app on my phone, and there are some achievements unique to the iOS.  There's also at least one unique to the Kobo Vox, which I don't have, and have no intention of buying.  There are several which are only available with newspaper or magazine subscriptions, and I've not intention of moving out of the UK to take advantage of those, either.

The table below is not a comprehensive list, but it will be as complete as I can make it.  You can have a look at some of the awards here, although I'm fairly sure that's not a comprehensive list either.  I don't have an android, and I gather that there are a few different achievements on there, and a few are time specific and have since been discontinued, so I've not heard of most of them. Unfortunately, Kobo seems to have lost interest in the awards system, as they've not added any new ones in some time.

When you first open your kobo, you'll see many of these awards greyed out.  I think a few of them only appear once you've got them, but don't ask me which ones.

Achievement	System	How-To
Afternoon Rush Hour	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 4pm and 6pm.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
All You Can Eat	Kobo, iOS	Fill your eReader with books.  I think I had somewhere between 50-100 on mine when I got this (I've since cleaned off a lot of the free ebooks, on the grounds that the paperback versions of Austen, Dickens, et al sat on my bookcases for years and I never read those either.  Can't abide Austen).
Author-ized Reader	iOS	I believe this has to do with the 'author notes' feature mentioned here.  I'm planning on reading Me Before You anyway; will update when I can. I've just discovered that you can't get it from reading the preview, even if you look at 'all notes' and click on the threads started by the author.
Better in Bed	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 10pm and 12am.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
BookLover	Kobo, iOS	Link your Kobo account to your eReader.  Although this is theoretically available on the Kobo, a glitch means it doesn't work.  However, if you unlock it on the iOS (by downloading the free app and logging in), it will sync across systems.
Breakfast of Champions/Eat It	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 5am and 7am.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Classic Attack	iOS	Read the five classic novels that come with your Kobo.  If, like me, you deleted the stupid things, these are the editions in question; Alice's Adventures in Wonderland The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn Dracula Grimms' Fairy Tales Pride and Prejudice Since I've read all but the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, I feel no guilt whatsoever about cheating.  Just spend ten minutes flicking through the books while watching TV. Note:  You can't get this by flicking to the start of each chapter, then through all the pages of the last one.  Do one book per day, and then do the Lost in Austen award in the same way, and you'll be most of the way through the Twain award by the end.
Deep Thinker	iOS	Make a note in any book.  Long press to highlight a word, then click 'add note' when the menu comes up.
Facebook	Kobo, iOS	Connect your Kobo account to Facebook.  This should be straightforward.  I did it fairly early on, in a 'gotta catch 'em all' spirit, so I can't quite recall how to.
Fanatic	iOS	Own more than five ebooks by one author.  Mine was Sheri Tepper.  You could probably get it with Dickens, since all of his are out of copyright now, if you don't fancy buying five books by any author.
Freeloader	iOS	Add ten free eBooks to your library.  If you're stuck for ideas, try here.
Fully Loaded	iOS	Add items from outside Kobo to your library.  I highly recommend Alicorn's Luminosity and the sequel, Radiance, but it's up to you. Go to the app screen in itunes, scroll right down, and click on the Kobo icon (incidentally, I had no idea you even could scroll down that far).  Add a document or two (PDF or ePub) then sync.
Graveyard Shift	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 1am and 5am.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Happy Hour	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 6pm and 8pm.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Highly Decorated	Kobo, iOS	Unlock twenty other achievements.
I ❤ My Library	Kobo, iOS	Add a book to your library.
I Eat Books for Lunch	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 12pm and 2pm.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Inverted Comma	Kobo, iOS	Highlight something.  Press and hold on a word to highlight, tap to make the dictionary definition go away, wiggle the little end markers if you like (this is a total pain to get right without lots of practice) then hit highlight down in the bottom left.
Juggernaut	Kobo, iOS	Turn 10,000 pages.  It took me about two months to get this.  Keep reading, you'll make it.  This is probably easier to get on the iOS due to the smaller screen.  You lightweight.
Just the Highlights	iOS	Highlight twenty different passages.  These can be single words.  Personally, I just picked random words in Grimms' Fairy Tales.  Made some very odd sentences.  It took a few minutes for my awards to catch up with my highlighting, so don't worry if it doesn't pop up immediately.
Kill the Commute	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 7am and 9am.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
LOLZ	iOS	Write a note with the word 'lol' in it.
Night Rider	Kobo, iOS	I have this award, but I'm not totally sure how I got it.  The description congratulations me on reading all night long, and I know I got it early on.  I typically read at night, but I'm not sure for how long, or which specific times.
Not an Open Book	Kobo, iOS	Finish a book.  This doesn't work if you open the mini-menu for a book (press and hold on book's name in library) and 'mark as finished'.  You need to go to the last page and close it by tapping right.
Off the Wall	iOS	This one drove me absolutely mental.  You need to share what you're reading in a very specific way, which took me a great deal of googling and experimentation to figure out. Step 1:  Press and hold on the cover of a book in your library.  You will be taken to the overview screen. Step 2:  Press the very rightmost button at the top of your screen in order to see a menu that includes 'share to facebook'.  Share this way, and it will count towards the award. Step 3:  Repeat for a total of five times.
Once Upon a Time	Kobo, iOS	Open a book for the first time.
Page Turner	Kobo, iOS	Read for two hours straight.  I did this during a very boring shift at the homeless shelter.  I was in clothing, which is where we have piles of donated clothes for people to sift through.  Even if no one wants to come down and shop, there still has to be someone sitting there.  That was my job.  Mine and Opal Kobo's (that's her name).
Papillon	Kobo, iOS	Share on facebook ten times.  I found the easiest way to do this was to share my highlighted passages.  My friends list got very sick of my Jinian Footseer quotes.  Tough, they should have fucking read it.  It's a good book.  My favourite.  And considering I've read over a hundred books so far this year alone, that's saying quite a lot.
Playing Hooky	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 2pm and 4pm.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Pressed for Details	Kobo, iOS	Press and hold on the title of a book in your library.
Primetime	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 8pm and 10pm.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Quoth the Maven	iOS	Highlight ten different things and post them to facebook by clicking and holding until the option comes up.  Easy peasy.
Reading Life	Kobo, iOS	Set up your ereader. Impossible not to get.
Scout Leader	Kobo, iOS	Unlock ten other achievements.
Sleeping In	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 9am and 12pm.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Total Recall	iOS	Reread any book.  I did this accidentally, with Francesca Lia Block's The Rose and the Beast.  There are plenty of short stories you could read through twice with ease.  If you get the PDF of The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas, then that'll help with the Freeloader, too.
Total Closer	iOS	Finish ten books.  If you can't do this, I feel bad for you, son.  I got ninety-nine problems, but not-reading ain't one.
The Twain Award	iOS	Open any book in the Kobo app once a day for two weeks.  Doesn't have to be the same book.
Lost in Austen	iOS	I believe you need to read five different Austen novels.  Bloody Austen.  Can't abide her.  There's something direful in the sound.
Witching Hour	Kobo, iOS	Read five times between 12am and 1am.  Open any book between those hours, on five different days.
Word Up!	Kobo, iOS	Use the Kobo dictionary to look up ten words.  Simply press and hold on a word in any book and it'll come up.
-	iOS	-