Boyfriend Dungeon

There was a lot about this game that I liked. It was, overall, a cute, quirky, fun game that was quite quick to finish. But, there was also something about it that bothered me, and it took me a while to put my finger on what it was.

First, I need to describe the game. You - a player-insert character with a fully customisable name and appearance - are spending the summer in Verona, California, with your cousin. Yes, this is a Romeo + Juliet reference. You haven't had much dating experience, so this is going to be your hot girl/guy/enby summer. Also, some humans in this world can turn into weapons and you can date them.

Basically, this is a romantic visual novel/dungeon crawler. Like I said, it's quite fun to play. But...none of the datable characters really appealed to me. They were all very 'meh.' I don't care about them, I don't particularly want my character to date them, I don't think they're cute. This is entirely a matter of taste, and someone else might feel very differently.

This does, however, lead me to the other problem which is, this game doesn't really care what you, the player, thinks. Despite positing the main character as being a self-insert, the game assigns them opinions and character traits. Don't want the dagger to kiss you? Tough, she's going to, and your characters reactions will range from 'happy' to 'super happy.' Don't particularly care if the talwar breaks up with you? No, you're wrong, you're heartbroken and your only dialogue choices will reflect that. Want a platonic relationship with the estoc? You don't have to agree to sleep with him, but the game still insists on treating him as a potential romantic partner which is, quite frankly, incredibly surreal placed next to the plot regarding an unwanted admirer. Oh that guy's creepy persistence is a problem but this guy is fine?

Now, I don't have a problem with playing a character who is an actual character. Tbh, I kind of miss it. Most of the games I've been playing recently are self-inserts. But if you're going to give me an actual character to play, don't pretend they're me. Let them just be who they are. Otherwise, I'm just going to feel the incongruity of having words put in my mouth when none of the dialogue choices are things I'd actually want to say.

As far as I can tell, nothing in this game requires that your character be a sweet ingenue, so stop forcing me to be one. If you want to specifically tell a story about a sweet ingenue, fine, but be open that that's what you're doing and that the character is a specific character and not whoever the player wants them to be.

I got this game in the Pride Humble Bundle, along with several others, so it worked out as costing £1.67. I played it for 13.8 hours, and I can't say I wouldn't recommend it, especially at that price. What you get out of it will depend on how closely your opinions align with the developers. Someone who's taste or personality is more similar to the lead character probably won't feel the dissonance that I felt.